thanksgiving

Thanks and Thanksgiving – Gratitude is a Gift, and So Is Remembrance

Reprint, with slight edits. First posted on November 21, 2010

Most of us know something about the abysmal history that follows from that first, mythical “Thanksgiving Day”.

I will not belittle the horror and carnage that followed the “founding of a new land” (new to whom?) as “manifest destiny” was used as an ideological weapon that allowed the settlers to push westward, killing people and destroying cultures, and irrevocably changing the fabric of a nation forever.

The inarguable atrocities occurred for hundreds of years, and continue to this day. The Trail of Tears (or, “Nunna dual Tsuni” in the Cherokee language; The Trail Where They Cried). “Americanization” of Native peoples. Broken treaties.

784px-the_first_thanksgiving_jean_louis_gerome_ferrisHowever, perhaps it isn’t essential to get attached to the negative political connotations of this holiday. To have Thanksgiving become Guiltfest.

Perhaps in all of this, we can also believe – or at least hope against hope – that there was, once upon a time, that first gathering of thanksgiving, where the newcomers, out of a deep sense of gratitude and recognition, invited the native people to share a feast with them in thanks for the help that had allowed the settlers to survive their early days in a new land.

This coming together of openhearted and grateful sharing is the spirit I attempt to enter into the holiday with. This, and the belief that it’s worth dedicating at least one day out of the year to the practice of gratitude.

Thanksgiving day does not need to be a political statement. I’ll go even further and say that though the institutionalization of the federal holiday may have originally been a political move, the observation of the holiday has become one of that is patently apolitical. And while the original wording of the proclamations that the Thanksgiving holiday is built upon were Christian in intent, the observation has become more or less secular.

Today, for most Americans, the spirit of Thanksgiving is one of inclusion. Pagans, and even Atheists celebrate Thanksgiving. It’s a chance to take inventory of our lives, an opportunity to consciously reflect upon and share the things we are truly grateful for with friends and family. And a time to indulge in the fruits of our harvests – literal or metaphoric – by way of a large feast, often brought together in a stone-soup or potluck manner.

Like so many of the celebrations of the darkening season, this feast is both a recognition of bounty, and a practice of faith. Faith that through shared abundance, there’s no winter that will be hard enough that we don’t get through it. And at the basic, beautiful, mundanely rooted nature of it, the actual bounty is in no way metaphoric, but is wholly celebratory.

Perhaps somewhere in these days leading up to the holiday you’ll take some time to reflect on the history of the native people of these lands, because this dark side of the history of this nation should never be forgotten – and all too often, it is.

1280px-Bia-map-indian-reservations-usaPerhaps you will educate your children about the shadows that dwell behind the images of Pilgrims and turkeys that adorn their classrooms, because their teachers are not going to. Maybe you’ll take a moment of silent prayer, or maybe even shared prayer, in recognition of the hidden history of the Indian Wars and the cultural genocide of the native peoples of this country before (or even at) your Thanksgiving gathering – because until there’s a federally recognized Indigenous People’s Day proclaimed, this is one of the few days out of the year that reminds us of our national shadow history.

And, maybe the awareness of what you’re grateful for will serve as a reminder to offer what you can to those who have less.

And, I hope you’ll begin counting your blessings. Because once you begin counting, you won’t be able to stop.

On Thanksgiving, you have an opportunity to recognize not just the bounty of your table piled high and your cup running over, but also the wealth of community, family, and abundance of all forms. And the more conscious you become of what it is that you’re grateful for, the deeper your experience of the holiday of Thanksgiving will be.

 

Some Thanksgiving Games:

Get GRATIGORIES! Get grateful.

(Click link above for a gift of a card game, from me to you.)

A Gratitude Round Robin – Gratitude Games * A Grateful A to Z – A Gratitude Game for Kids of All Ages

A Gratitude Game – Gratitude Round-Robin
Posted on November 21, 2010

Definition of Terms

a. Round is a go-around where everyone in a group gives their answer.

b. Round-Leader is the facilitator of the round. This position transitions at the conclusion of each round. The role of round leader can go to the person who wants it next, or you can pass the role in the round, either to the left or right. If a player does not want to be a round leader, they can pass.

Basic Guidelines:

a. Never force, “cajole” , or pressure any player into responding to any prompt. “Pass” is always an acceptable response.

b. The main rule is: Answer from gratitude. BE GRATEFUL!

c. Always give the person who is offering their gratitude the floor. Do not interrupt them, question them, or quiet them. If you’re playing this as a family, it’s especially important that you allow one another the full range of voice.

Round-Robin:

Sitting in a circle, or around a table, one person starts with a statement of gratitude, then everyone else in the group follows one-by-one. The group can set guidelines as desired.

Some possibilities:

  • Stay within a theme for each round.
  • No repeats per round. (For example, if someone says they’re grateful for family, someone else may say they’re grateful for a person IN their family, but not repeat the more general idea.)
  • Staying with one idea for every round (like, the round-leader says they’re grateful for apples, then everyone in the round says why they’re grateful for apples).

A Grateful A – Z — A Gratitude Game for Kids of All Ages
Posted on November 17, 2010

When I was a kid, we played alphabet games in the car to pass the time on long drives or road trips. I’ve recreated one of those games, with a gratitude theme. A Grateful A to Z includes players of all ages – from talking age up.

A Grateful A to Z is an adaptable game. Variations are listed below. For young players, A Grateful A to Z serves two purposes; it teaches both language skills and gratitude! And, with older players, there are ways to make A Grateful A to Z more complicated.

You can choose a category, or allow A Grateful A to Z to be free-form. Free-form is recommended for younger players, and is easier than working with a category. Themes or categories are recommended for more advanced players.

1. Definition of terms:

a. “Round” is a go-around where everyone in a group gives their answer to the category, or passes.

b. “Round-Leader” is the facilitator of the round. This position transitions at the conclusion of each round. The role of round leader can go to the person who wants it next, or you can pass the role in the round, either to the left or right. If a player does not want to be a round leader, they can pass.

2. Basic Guidelines:

a. The main rule is: Answer from gratitude. Be GRATEFUL!

b. Never force, cajole, or pressure any player into responding to any prompt. “Pass” is always an acceptable response.

c. Always give the person who is offering their gratitude the floor. Do not interrupt, question, or quiet them. If you’re playing this as a family, it’s especially important that you allow one another the full range of voice.

Remember, you can print out these directions, or you can upload them to your palm-top and not print at all. Please keep your “footprint” in mind when considering your options.

Variations and Detailed Guidelines:

A Grateful A – Z, Freeform:
The round leader starts a round with the phrase “I’m grateful for…”, and chooses anything starting with an A. The round leader can pass the prompt either to the right or left. The round ends when the alphabet ends. You can make it more complicated by offering a “no repeats” guideline.

A Grateful A – Z, with Themes:
Round leader comes up with a theme – people you’re grateful for, things you’re grateful for, inventions you’re grateful for.

Enjoy your family this holiday season!

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